Regret it
You're fourteen and sitting, lost in
a strangers car
at 2 a.m. Surrounded by pasture
cornfields, cattle grazing, a dark barn
patches of moon and stars. You don't understand
the moment- the loss, life full of experiences.
Sudden regret. A lake full of tears. You run
away from this choice, parked-jump from the
passenger seat. trees scratching and grabbing
like greedy hungry monsters,
into the safety of the barn. Sweet crunch
and snap of hay under your bare feet
your face puffy, eyesight
obscured by clouding tears, face glistening
your stuffy nose. The car drives by, slowly,
looking for your false promises.
This is a mimic poem based on the syntax and format of "Deer Hit" by Jon Loomis. We use mimicry in class to provide a "template" or guideline for students to get through that writers block that often keeps kids from delving into poetry on their own. More about mimic poems here. For this assignment I had students think of something they regret from their past, write about as if they are retelling themselves what happened, while reflecting on the events and how they felt.
a strangers car
at 2 a.m. Surrounded by pasture
cornfields, cattle grazing, a dark barn
patches of moon and stars. You don't understand
the moment- the loss, life full of experiences.
Sudden regret. A lake full of tears. You run
away from this choice, parked-jump from the
passenger seat. trees scratching and grabbing
like greedy hungry monsters,
into the safety of the barn. Sweet crunch
and snap of hay under your bare feet
your face puffy, eyesight
obscured by clouding tears, face glistening
your stuffy nose. The car drives by, slowly,
looking for your false promises.
This is a mimic poem based on the syntax and format of "Deer Hit" by Jon Loomis. We use mimicry in class to provide a "template" or guideline for students to get through that writers block that often keeps kids from delving into poetry on their own. More about mimic poems here. For this assignment I had students think of something they regret from their past, write about as if they are retelling themselves what happened, while reflecting on the events and how they felt.